I was taught to be independent. Self-sufficient. Not to bother anyone with any of my personal issues. So it should not have surprised me when I discovered that I am withholding portions of my heart and soul from my Savior whom I love. But it did.
After all, He is the One that I've pledged to give EVERYTHING to. The One I worship and adore and, in worshipping have, with every fiber of my being, offered my surrender.
Yet, somehow my surrender has been skewed. Somehow all this time I always envisioned surrendering as giving my all…all my will, gifts, talents, trust, hope, faithfulness, service. You know, all the good things that seem usable.
In embarking on a new and profound journey with Him, I've discovered burdens and baggage I've been dragging around like misfit mongrels that keep jerking me around and pulling me down. Like walking four wild dogs, their leashes have formed a tangled trap which has wrapped so tightly around me I can barely move. I missed giving Him all my junk, my misfit mongrels. I guess I never thought about bothering Him with those unwanted pests.
I like to call them issues…that way they sound innocuous, harmless. Many of us have issues. Issues with fear, control, anger, unforgiveness, or insecurity…the list is endless. Endless, but far from innocuous.
While mine strangle me, the interesting thing is that I'm the one holding their leashes. All I have to do is let go of them. Open my tight-fisted grip and let go. When I do, God will step in and masterfully untangle them and set me free.
Do you have misfit mongrels you are trying to tame too?
He passionately desires to release us from the leashes of the untamed, setting us free before they strangle the very life out of us.
"Then Jesus said, 'Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.'" - Matthew 11:28-29 NLT
My journey of letting go and surrendering my misfit mongrels is just beginning. I can sense the freedom that awaits me as His healing power reaches to untangle, heal and set me free. Amazingly, what seems unusable to me is what, when surrendered, will bring Him the most glory.
All we have to do is let go. All we have to do is surrender.
Lord of All, please help us surrender our all to You. So often we find that we take back what we surrender even when it threatens to strangle our heart and soul. Help us to remember that true rest comes in laying those misfit mongrels at your feet for all time. We thank you for being our ultimate Peacemaker. - Amen